Typical Reactions of Children
Generally, kids whose parents are going through a rough divorce participate in behaviours which are designed to help them feel safe. What follows are some typical experiences of children to separation and divorce:
This particularly happens in young kids and surfaces as story telling (Mommy and Daddy and me going to Disneyland; we are moving into a duplex and Daddy will reside next door; they may also have reconciliation dreams).
Kids stress that will take care of them when parents separate. They're scared one or both of their parents will also are divorceable and abandons them.
3. Preoccupation with info
Kids will need details of what's occurring and how they are affected by it. Communicating from your parents age appropriate and needs to be coordinated.
Kids may express hostility and anger . Hostility of children toward parents is frequently directed at the parent perceived to be to blame. Inward looks turned like depression in kids.
Lethargy, sleep and eating disturbances, acting out, social withdrawal, physical harm (more common in teenagers).
They may do some "baby talk" or wet their beds. Kids may become "parentified" by what they perceive to function as the psychological and physical demands of the parents ("Someone must be in charge here.")
The more conflict there is between the parents, the kids that are longer hold onto the belief of the parents' reconciliation. It's clear the parents aren't "getting on" with their lives. Kids will frequently act out in ways which drive their parents to socialize (negatively or positively). Kids whose parents were really conflictual during the union frequently mistake the powerful emotions of struggle with familiarity. They see the parents participated within an intimate relationship.
Because so much married battle may be related to the stress of parenting, kids often feel responsible for his or her parents' divorce–they feel that it was led to by their conduct. This really is particularly so when in negotiating programs during exchanges of the kids or parents fight: kids see that they are being fought over by parents. They may make an effort to haggle their parents by promises of good behaviour; they WOn't go with another parent or may have difficulty with transitions.
Kids will frequently act out their own and their parents' rage. Within an effort to live in a hostile environment, kids will generally choose the side of the parent they have been at present with. This may show in refusals to speak with another parent on the telephone or unwillingness to share time with another parent. Teens will usually act out in ways similar to the way the parents are acting out. Get to know more about divorced singles at meetingdivorced.com